Tell me more about me please!

For most of us, our daily life consists of a mundane amount of mindless tasks on repeat such as drinking coffee, going to work, or going to the bathroom. The consistency makes life both boring and comforting at the same time. Simply put: we know who we are and how we will react to everything because we have been tested with it so many times.

However, from time to time, we are faced with new, BIG changes or challenges that we are not equipped for mentally and/or physically. It is in these new experiences that we learn more about ourselves, and we develop some comfort in how we handle this new "normal".

Personally, I love these moments. I love finding out more about myself, and I enjoy the aspect of my life changing. It's an exhilarating and enjoyable time! Having said that, there is a step in this process that I absolutely cannot stand: the "you will..." step.

For those that are not quite sure what I mean, think about the last monumental change in your life. For me, it would be finding out I am going to be a father. Trust me, I am incredibly excited, and I cannot wait to love that little girl more than anything in the world. The one thing I do not know yet is the obvious: I don't know how I will be as a father.

Will I be strict? Overbearing? Laid back? Will I be patient? Short-tempered? How will I be during child birth? Sure, I could go on and on, but you get the point. I have ideas of how I will be, but it's new to me; I haven't experienced it yet. I know who I am as a person, and I will remain me in this new adventure. However, I don't know how I will handle every situation because I have yet to experience it.

Somehow, however, other people know exactly how I will be and act. "You will react this way", or "You won't do this". Oh, well, thank you for telling me exactly how I will be in this specific scenario. Since you have been to the future, please tell me if Berkeley gets in to Harvard as well. The truth is you don't any better who I am or how I will be than I do...so why say anything at all?

I think the human condition is designed so that everyone wants to act like they know everything about you including your thoughts, motives, and emotions. Unfortunately, the human condition also appears to be designed for this to be exceptionally annoying to other humans; this is quite a horrible cyclical paradigm.

On the bright side, we can break the wheel pretty easily: just don't say a damn thing. Don't pretend to know how I will act to things. Don't pretend that you know how I will handle situations with my daughter. Don't assume to know my emotional state in a situation that has not even happened. If someone gets a promotion, don't tell them you know they will be stressed out. If someone buys a new car, don't tell them you know they will hate how it drives. Let people be people; chances are, they know themselves better than you do.